But I wish to be an order muppet

Last week, my friend Cristin ended up accidentally being my chaperone for the day. We had a work date that was split into two parts a doctor’s appointment. Our work date ended in time to head home in rush hour traffic.

The end of our day was poorly timed because I was in charge of the time. I should never be in charge of time.

While we were moving from our doctor’s appointment interlude to the second half of our work date, we talked about the chaos muppet vs. order muppet theory of humanity. I’ve thought about it a lot and if I were a muppet, I would be Grover. My interest in semantics makes any instance involving scalar adjectives a potential nightmare for anyone who wants me to make some kind of decision. If I had a secret identity, it would be semi-secret (a la Super Grover) and I would talk to the narrator (or, I’d break the fourth wall, like Deadpool, who is undoubtedly also a chaos muppet). Grover is a chaos muppet and I am also a chaos muppet.

Grover serves up burgers and laughs at Charlie's Restaurant

But, I wish I were an order muppet. All of my attempts at organizing and keeping myself on the straight and narrow in order to get shit done are my attempts at being an order muppet. This is what makes me a good person for testing out various methods of organization and productivity. They aren’t things I’m inherently good at it, so when something works for me, that’s a pretty good indication that it is, at the very least, an easy system to implement and follow.

Like Grover, I am also cute. Plus, I have trouble sticking the landing.

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