I feel like an orphan today. Well, its not an apt metaphor. I don’t feel abandoned or alone. Actually, I have dinner plans I’m pretty excited about. I just feel like I have broken the connection between the part of me that functions in the world and the part of me responsible for synthesizing and critically analyzing things I connect in the world. This is problematic since, as a graduate student, my job is pretty much to synthesize and analyze things. It is an unpleasant feeling.
In an effort to jump start things, to find this lost bit of me or to reconnect with this abandoned piece of my, I started iTunes and put it on random. The first song that was played was the first song from Neko Case’s album Middle Cyclone. Its a pretty song, its melodic and a little soft. And, then you listen to the lyrics. “My Love, I am the speed of sound/ I left them Motherless, fatherless” Neko Case croons in the opening two lines. And, the imagery gets increasingly gory. “Their souls dangling inside-out from their mouths…” Yet, it remains the same, lovely melodic little tune. “I carved your name across three counties/and ground it in with bloody hides.”
Life has this way of being brutal and beautiful at the same time. And, obsessive and destructive. I mean, no one really wants a companion who will literally rip the world to shreds for them. Well, “no one” is a pretty bold statement. Most people, perhaps? I don’t know what the song is about. As I said, the part of me responsible for synthesis is AWOL. Nope, don’t know what it is about. But, I like it.
Song: This Tornado Loves You
Performer: Neko Case
Album: Middle Cyclone
